If you had asked me before tonight what my favorite concert I’ve attended is, I would’ve said your show two and half years ago at Bowery Ballroom. It was the final night of your Christmess Singalong Tour, and it was the greatest, funnest (yes, funnest) show I’ve ever had the pleasure of attending.
That all changed tonight, when you outdid yourself. What an ethereal experience.
Who would’ve thought that an album written primarily about the loss of your mother (something I have not experienced, blessedly, as my own mom is alive and well) would have affected me as much as it has. It snuck up behind me and nestled itself deep into a hole that must have been sitting in my chest for some time, filling it up with what must be, it has to be, it feels like gallons of water until I choke for air. It took my breath away so wholly, so completely, that I can’t even imagine my life before the existence of Carrie and Lowell, though it wasn’t even two months ago that it was released.
It would have been enough to just hear you play the entirety of Carrie and Lowell tonight, which happened in the most spectacular fashion. I couldn’t fathom getting to finally hear the album live, and the way you managed to reimagine such already well-crafted songs in front of all of us there, to embody them so much more fully in person, was beyond what I could’ve dreamt.
But on top of that, you punctured the show in the middle to play “Concerning the UFO sighting near Highland, Illinois.” And somehow, somewhere, something aligned and you played not only this, my favorite song of yours, but also “The Dress Looks Nice on You,” “To Be Alone With You,” and “Futile Devices.” You also gave me the pleasure of hearing “For the Widows” for the second time live.
And please don’t even get me started on the finale before your encore. Those few minutes where there was nothing but sound—sound that I could not only hear, but see and feel and taste and touch—were above all else my favorite moments in the show. Who needs words to express when sometimes sound is enough? Sound was just enough tonight.
Tonight, something inside of me broke and then fixed itself. It was something I didn’t know that I needed, but I’m glad I found out that I did. Thank you, Sufjan. Thank you.
lewlewbelle 